‘What challenges do you have with your child?’ ‘What life skills do you want for your child?’
These were among the questions that were discussed in our Positive Parenting sessions. Ms. Brown, our elementary school counselor, and Dr. Lowery, our kindergarten teacher, have organized a series of five positive parenting sessions, and they just finished the fourth session this week.
Positive Parenting sessions are where our parents can connect with each other, learn parenting tips from our experienced counselors and teachers, and discuss various parenting topics in a safe and comfortable setting. Each session has been interactive and inclusive - participants were enjoying sharing their experiences and listening to each other.
Ms. Brown and Dr. Lowery have covered different topics in each session so far, and below are some examples from the previous sessions. If you would like to explore relevant topics, please join the next Positive Parenting session, which is scheduled for March 13th!
Supporting problem-solving:
Session 1 touched on strategies to support children with problem-solving. The participants agreed that one of the important roles as parents when their child has an issue is to grasp the whole story and guide the child to solve the problem by him/herself. It is also essential to trust that the child has the ability to solve the problem on his/her own.
Praise and encouragement:
Session 2 involved a role-play activity to learn about the difference between praise and encouragement. During the role-play, one ‘parent’ reacted with a lot of praising words, such as ‘you are such a good boy/girl’ to the accomplishment of the ‘child,’ while the other ‘parent’ gave a lot of encouraging words, such as ‘you worked hard; you deserve it’ and ‘you must be proud of yourself.’ The ‘children’ mentioned that the encouragement made them feel that the whole process of the achievement was recognized and made them more confident.
Good listening:
In session 3, the participants compared multiple styles of listening through more role-play. They found that the ‘questioner’ type of listening worked the best to validate children’s feelings and help solve the problem. This is because the questioner listening shows compassion, accepts their feeling, and listens to understand, not to give the answer.
Connection before correction:
Session 4 was about consequences and punishment. It is often the case that a child is not willing to listen to their parents, especially when they are playing or they are on electronic devices, and many of the participants in this session said it happened to them quite frequently. Ms. Brown and Dr. Lowery’s advice for that situation was that parents should show their willingness to understand and connect first, and then cooperate to find a solution, rather than just telling them what to do.